The reality that life on earth is temporary and precious has been heavy on my heart for the past few weeks. The constant news cycle of sudden accidents, violence, and lives ending too soon has caused for some deep thoughts and existential conversations with myself. For a few weeks, up until a few days ago, I’d find myself up late at night restless at the thought of not knowing when my last day could be and how none of it is in my control. This is when I come back to my favorite scripture Matthew 6:34-36 which says “Therefore, do not worry about tomorrow for tomorrow will worry about itself, each day has enough trouble of its own”
Out of all the worrying and imagining the most disastrous situations, not a single hour was added to my life or anyone else’s life that could find themselves taking their last breath. Thinking about life and death is a normal thing that probably everyone will go through but it can be hard getting out of those deep thoughts of things that are so powerful but you have 0 control over. I want to enjoy the time I do still have on this Earth and not spend moments that I have where I’m supposed to be sleeping up worrying about what could happen. So how do we get out of the real feelings of fear? What is it that we can do now that the thought seems to not go away? Here are some practical steps I’m putting into motion currently and some helpful tips you can use if you find that you can also relate to these feelings:
Monitor Media Intake
Having the internet at our fingertips has connected us to the entire world in ways that were never possible. But with this, we are constantly connected and notified about what’s going on and the bad, terrifying, and shocking news rises to the forefront. I noticed how I felt over these last few weeks and I began to feel more anxious in between the funny tweets and posts, I was seeing the faces of people super young dying from shootings, being stabbed, missing person photos, human trafficking and so much terrible news. Some accidents were close to home and some far away. But still, the visuals and faces made my heart beat fast and my eyes water just at the thought of something terrible like that. So I said, alright we are going to have to start making some changing with how I consume media, at least for right now. I remember in Cuba when I had no social media for an entire week I felt the calmest, free, and present than I had ever felt, so I knew only good could come from this. I’m limiting my social media intake at the moment and finding ways to make utilize it more productively. Taking a break right now has been super beneficial for my emotional health as I’m focusing on prioritizing being able to sleep and lower my stress level. If you often feel affected after viewing and listening to stories on the web, I think this is a critical measure you can take regarding finding some peace with the world we live in.
Find Someone to Talk to/Therapy
I hadn’t made progress with finding a way to move forward because I hadn’t put into words the extent to how I was feeling. It felt weird writing or saying it out loud because I don’t want to “put anything into the atmosphere” and “there’s power of life and death in the tongue”. So I went weeks without saying anything or even writing it in my journal out of some fear that even thinking it would make it real. Feeling anxious is real. Having trouble sleeping is real. Feeling a constant state of worry is real. Crying out of the overwhelming thought of something that hasn’t happened is real. All valid reasons to say something to someone. If you have a therapist or trusted source, I think this very subject is something you should talk about. No one wants to talk about death but it’s just as much a part of life as life itself because everyone will go through it. None of us are immortal.
Remember What’s Most Important to You in Life
What simple things will make you feel proud of the life that you’ve lived on Earth? This is something that you DO have control over. It can help to write this down to further ingrain this into your mind what matters. You can also practice this in the form of a gratefulness journal where you write down things you’re grateful for that mean something to you. I have my health, I have a place to live, I have my family, I have love and peace within me. These are things I can feel and see. These are things that feel good to me. Through this, I am moving toward the light and positivity which always overshadows the darkness.
Find Helpful Apps and Tools
Recently I’ve found sleeping stories to help calm my mind at night. Even though my thoughts have shifted from the sad subjects, I have always had a very buzzing mind at night with lots of thoughts about the day, things I want to do in the future, and pretty much having vivid daydreams before actually falling asleep. With the free version of the Calm app, I’ve been listening to the bedtime story about this lavender field that’s South of France and now I unconsciously really want to visit this said location and watch the farmers distill the lavender plants into lavender oil. But anyway, I find that before the story is over I have dozed off. There are so many other sleep podcasts and playlists that I’m excited to try related to helping me fall asleep. Other helpful apps and tools to utilize can include setting screen time limitations in your phone settings, Talkspace online therapy, Headspace, and Calm mindfulness apps, using a voice recorder to talk out your thoughts, and even writing positive affirmations on your phone.
Breathe
Remember to focus on breathing and slowing it down has been key throughout the day in many situations. Whatever you may be going through doesn’t last forever. The good and bad days are the same length – 24 hours. An if we just focus on inhaling and exhaling, we are still moving forward.
As always,
Take it step by step and DaibyDai