Someone Who Plans Everything Learning to Embrace Series of Changes

Hey Daizies!

I hope everyone is having a wonderful year so far. I wanted to take some time to blog about how life is going and what I’m feeling as one chapter in my life closes and another one begins.

February is almost over and just like that I have only 3 weeks of college. I’ve seen 3 weeks and 3 months pass by, so I know it’s only a matter of time before I am finishing the last question of my last final. I’ll walk out of the classroom and that’ll be it. I’ll really be done. I’ve probably dreamed of this day for forever! This quarter is the first quarter since my semester abroad where I could really breathe. I only have two classes and they aren’t the type where I have to put in extra hours to study and go to tutoring and just pray I pass. I’m actually doing just fine. And the thing I smile about is that everything I was worried about during my time in college, worked out to how it was supposed to. These classes that I feel confident about are both Information Systems classes. The subject I was so nervous and sometimes felt inadequate of taking or even adding it as my second business concentration. It worked out.

It Feels Good to Breathe

I wake up on Mondays, whenever I want just as long as it’s before 12:15pm. I go to class and lowkey can’t wait till it’s over. I don’t have a to-do list full of things I so desperately need to finish. I could go to the gym, go to the mall, get my nails done, and even come home and watch 2000s black movies.  It feels so good to breathe. I worked so so hard to be in the place where I have my dream job after college and where I can feel good about what I’ve done in college. I’ll never forget the grind though. Last quarter up until about mid-November, it was rush rush rush. Every hour of the day was dedicated towards something school or recruiting related. And any moment or second I wasn’t busy felt like I was wasting time. I’d be lucky if I could sneak in an episode while I tied my hair up for the night and woke up to do the same thing over again. I remember the panic in my heart as I knew this one test could make or break my ability to stay above a certain GPA which meant scholarships, job opportunities, or even getting into my major. I remember going to office hours twice a week, finding the perfect Youtube professor, and reading the lectures and book chapters before class for a whole quarter, only to get a 2.0 in the class in the end. I remember calculating my grades and assignments mid-quarter to see what the absolute worst case scenario could be that still meant passing the class. I struggled up until my senior year when I thought everything would suddenly become easier. I worked so so hard. And now it’s time to celebrate and just be proud of myself.

A Little Nervous Though

Sometimes my heart beats a little faster thinking about a whole new life ahead. A different schedule. Different responsibilities. Moving. Figuring things out. Having a real job. This routine, people around me, and the atmosphere are all so familiar. I’m comfortable. It’s comforting. So yes I’m a little nervous of having college end. I’m gonna miss the experience. The experience of growing up and learning. Finding things to do around Seattle, the memories, and the excitement of college life. But I am so glad I did everything I wanted to do in college. I took risks. I lived. I know there’s more living to do so I try not to feel like college is the only time I can be fun and adventurous lol! There’s gotta be more on the other side, even though the other side seems scary.


I find myself just wanting to take pieces and moments of my life and combine them to form an ideal life. If I could take this part of this year or that moment from that month then I could have full control over how I feel. I admit sometimes I just want things to stay the same. People to not leave. Things to not catch me off guard. But I’m gonna try being more flexible. Breathe. Let go. Not plan every single thing even down to how I want to feel. Just breathe. Learn to let go. Don’t be so hard on yourself. It’s okay to make mistakes. 

Rejection = New Opportunities

I look back at all the things I was most nervous about in college and I just sigh with relief and smile with contentment that everything worked out the way God planned. It’s sometimes so annoying to think about taking my own advice of realizing everything works out for the best because in the moment, the emotions and struggle feel so heavy, so strong and so strong. The feeling of not knowing and having plans just take a turn is something that can sometimes just cloud the wisdom I know I have. It’s like how can I possibly not worry when it feels like my whole life just got flipped upside down? Spring quarter of my freshman year, I applied to one of the coveted intern spots for a Boeing program. I was sure this was going to help me get my foot in the door of an amazing company and I wouldn’t have to worry about my career options if I just succeeded as an intern. I felt it would probably even help my chances of getting into the business school! After the workshops and getting my application reviewed numerous times, I was hoping for good news. When I found out I didn’t get that internship, I was devastated. That, in my mind, was the path I needed to succeed. But you know what, it just wasn’t meant. I did have an unpaid internship that year but made the most of my experiences and let that shine during the application process for business and for my next internship at T-Mobile. That was 3 years ago. I thought one thing was going to lead me to landing a great job but my route changed for the better.

As I type this, it’s like wow I really need to take my own advice lol. There’s still some things in my personal life occurring and I’m just like “why?”. I really can’t see where God is going with this. What is to come of this? Again, I’m full of plans and meticulous about each step I take. I could do everything I think is “right” and it still no work out they way I expect it. I don’t know everything. I can’t control everything, no matter how far in advance I plan. It’s okay. Like with the Boeing internship, just because that didn’t work out it didn’t mean I wouldn’t get other internships and lead me to landing a full-time position in marketing at Microsoft. So I still don’t have explanations for everything that happens in life but that’s just why I have to take it step by step and daibydai.


Happy New Year! | 2018 I’m Ready

Happy New Year Daizies!

Letting go of the trials and tribulations of 2017 and accepting my blessings for 2018! I’m feeling relaxes, excited, and just ready for what the year has to offer. I’ve taken time to write in my journal and this time organized my goals in categories such as health, finances, career, school etc. This is just a short excerpt to bring in the new year and post my favorite New Years pictures!







Update: Summer 2017 Fitness

Greeting Daizies,

I wanted to post an update regarding my summer 2017 fitness goals.During the earlier part of summer, I had signed up for a YMCA membership and was going to the gym 3 times a week. My ultimate goal was to loose 15 pounds by the time school started, become stronger, and have a healthier diet.

Readjusting my Weight-loss Goal to No Weight-loss Goal at All


Fast forward to now and my outlook on fitness has completely changed. I was so adamant about loosing 15 pounds in order to achieve the weight I had when I was studying abroad. Now, I am not all about weight-loss. Last fall of 20016, I was traveling almost every week which meant walking about 20-30 miles a week. My lifestyle has changed and I don’t want to be stuck trying to force my body to maintain the weight I had at 20 or in high school.

What I’m focused on now is being active in a way that is sustainable. I’ve spent majority of college and actually most of my life with some sort of weight loss goal. Even in middle school I wanted loose weight, usually a small amount, but I always wanted to change something. At some point you gotta just be happy with how your body changes and the way it is.  I’m finally at that point now. My body changes as my lifestyle changes and I want to be more focused on working my way up to actually exercising frequently even when I get busy.

Now I want to focus more on my goal of improving my performance with working out rather than weight loss. This means, being able to run a little longer and lift 10 pound weights with my squats eventually. My weight will fluctuate a few pounds up and down and having a strict schedule of loosing weight became frustrating and wasn’t that fun. I’m at a healthy weight for my height, so I don’t want to put so much pressure on myself to loose so much weight just to be at the same size I was when I was younger. I want to love and appreciate the way my body is now.

Nap or Gym?


The hardest thing with staying consistent was actually leaving my house to go workout once the weather started getting cold. After class and work, the main thing that’s on my mind is taking a nap, and once I’m in the house I’m in the house.It’s rainy season during the fall and winter, and there’s not much that can make me leave the house once I’m inside lol.So there were several weeks where I was in the zone juggling school and finding the motivation to exercise even at home was difficult. Towards the end of the summer, that fire slowly died down as I was so eager to end work and go to Ghana. When school started I went maybe once a month, and three times this month of December. Sometimes, I did workouts at home when I felt like it. Next year I hope to feel like it more, or maybe incorporate light exercise into my morning routine of yoga. I’ll have more time in the morning/afternoon since my classes start a little later next quarter (it’s my last quarter omg!).

But What About All Those Swiss Rolls?

Okay I can admit my diet hasn’t change much since my summer article. I pretty much eat whatever I want.  On a weekly basis I will most likely eat my famous homemade sub sandwich, some form of chicken and rice, peppered steak, oatmeal/cereal/bagel and cream cheese for breakfast. I’d say overall I have an average/healthy diet. I always have some apples, grapes, bananas, and oranges in rotation and of course I’m drinking plenty of water. But I am a sweets person, and I did just eat a box of swiss rolls to myself within 3 days lol. I hate depriving myself of what I love (chocolate cakes and cookies lol) so why should I? I just know that once I start, it’s hard to stop. Therefore, not getting into the habit of ALWAYS buying Tollhouse cookies and Simply juices are better for me. I “try” *keyword is “try”*

Overall, my biggest health success was accepting my body weight as is and having a more positive body image and increasing my water intake.


Have a great New Year everyone!-POP



My Golden Birthday|22 on 22!

Hi Daizies!

This is my first blog post since turning 22 years old. I’m typing different, I’m breathing different lol. November has brought so much good news and I celebrated my golden birthday to celebrate the new blessings. A golden birthday happens when you turn the same age as the day of your birthday, so I turned 22 on November 22nd.

The weeks leading up to my birthday were very active and led into some amazing news.I entered fall recruiting season ambitious and organized, with the goal of landing an amazing job. From mid-October to mid-November, I interviewed with 4 companies and there was a week where I had 2 final interviews and 3 midterms in the same week!  I didn’t know how I was going to do it sometimes, because I was literally preparing for 3 different classes while trying to prep for different company interviews. But after juggling all of these demands, I received two job offers for very competitive positions and one being my dream job in marketing!!! I did great on my midterms too. It feels so surreal that all of this is really happening. I truly spoke this into existence.

What I Did for my Birthday

I rang in my 22nd birthday i style of course. It was a girls night out with hours left until my big day. We shut the karaoke bar down and I turned 22 as I performed Formation with the crowd going wild (dramatization). Afterwards, we went to a 90s night at a nightclub we hadn’t yet been to. On my actual birthday, I slept in and started my day with yoga like I always do. I took a while redoing a portion of my faux locs and then quickly went to get a pedicure. The night began with a mini photoshoot and then we headed downtown for dinner at a grill house. I ended the night dancing and surrounded by good vibes.


Looking back on my 21st year on earth, I would say I experienced a lot and learned that I am such a strong person. It definitely wasn’t my easiest year. It was the year of unexpected shifts with the dynamics of basically all of the important relationships with the people in my life. I couldn’t control the actions or lives of others. The only thing I could control, was myself and what I wanted. I continued to travel, had my best academic quarter in school, an internship in advertising, and actually found counseling really helpful. I am proud of myself for still valuing my priorities and doing things that I really wanted to do, no matter what was happening with other people.

Being 21 really pushed me to my limits. The highs were really good but the lows were really really low. There were so many times I wished my life was easier. In April, I really just wanted to be done with school. I thought about dropping Information Systems and getting up out of school as fast as I could. But I stuck it out. I wouldn’t have been able to interview for the position I just got if I had’ve just stopped before really seeing everything through. The past year, I really wanted things and people to stop changing and moving around. I had to relearn a different life to adjust to the things I couldn’t control. And I’m still here. I survived. I learned that no matter what’s going on with everyone else, I still have to deal with me and it’s important to take care of myself first.

At 22, I feel on top of the world. I worked so hard to get to where I am now and it’s time to celebrate the grind.  I am hoping for more laughs, happiness, and smiles than the bad times. Being worried is tiresome. Trying to change and make people do what you want them to do, is just so tiring and stressful. I deserve to be happy. At 22, I want to let go of things that do not concern me. I am not going to exert any more energy into concerns that aren’t benefiting my life at all, I think I did that enough the past year. I know what I’m capable of now. I’m even more independent as ever and I know that I can’t really control change but that I will be okay. I’m ready to keep on evolving and growing.

I thank God for another year. I made it.



Self Care Trip 2017 | I Think Things Will Be Okay

Greetings Daizies,

I was on a roll in August with frequent uploads until I went to Ghana. It was a jam packed program and I’ve basically written tons of posts in my head lol. It’s crazy that it’s almost October and I’ll be starting my final year of college. Right now I’m in Portugal on a well needed self care trip. I needed a buffer between Ghana and going straight home. When I study abroad, I find it hard to go straight from an active, adventurous, and fun program filled with exploring to the rigorous demands of school, life, and rainy Seattle. It can truly be depressing. My intentions with these 3 days in Portugal is for reflection, rest, and to get into the right mindset to go back home.

I could feel myself getting anxious during my last week in Ghana. I would wake up with my heart beating fast and feeling like I wanted to cry. I had literally just woken up and nothing had happened yet. That’s how I knew I was just generally nervous and anxious, when I was just waking up and already sad. I strongly related to Solange’s ‘Cranes in the Sky’ when she said “I tried to run it away
Thought then my head be feeling clearer
I traveled 70 states
Thought moving round make me feel better” because when I’m away from home I can just leave my worries, problems, responsibilities, people, anything really at home. I feel free and I’m learning when I’m gone. But the sudden reality that this was my last study abroad program and around the corner was real life, kept running through my mind. Everything is different regarding a lot of things in my life compared to coming back abroad from Italy and the UK. I just don’t know what life is going to be like with the change of dynamics in personal relationships. The closer my departure came, the more anxious I became. I didn’t want to necessarily stay but I knew I didn’t want to go home just yet. This is what my trip to Portugal is for.

I’ve been in Lisbon for just a day and I can say I haven’t felt anxious or sad. I took a long nap when I arrived and then explored the area until I found live music and some food. Along the way I went shopping and bought a couple of cute pieces for my new fall wardrobe. Going solo travel is so fun because I’m on my own time and can literally do whatever I want and go off schedule depending on my mood. Most of the time, people want to just go go go as soon as they land. It’s like every minute needs to be occupied or its considered wasting time. But when its just me, myself, and I things are planned according to my mood and interests. A 3 hour nap was needed and some shopping in between occurred just because I wanted it to. And right now, I’m just blogging and have a  general idea of what time I want to leave the house, but there’s no set time or another person I have to be mindful of. It’s just what I needed right now after a whole month of organized activity and being with a group.

I know that this won’t be forever but I want my relaxed mindset to last a while. I’m going to do some sincere journaling to brainstorm solutions to problems I can control and ways I can be at peace with things I have no control over. I know I would rather be happy than sad. But there’s just days where I don’t know how to start my day because my mind is overwhelmed with every possible problem and challenging scenario in the world. It always seems to happen when I’m about to start a brand new day or go out somewhere. But when I get moving and start my day, I don’t have time to think about the reasons why I felt numb waking up. I want to work through whatever that is and not just keeping myself busy an avoiding it. I know I briefly looked into therapy but I put it on hold since I was about to travel. I might resume that search when I get back. Maybe it’ll be a rewarding experience. I’ve heard it’s lit lol.

I’m going straight into my career search when I get back home. It’s crazy to think this entire chapter of undergrad is about to come to an end. I think the idea of being in a full-time job is scary because it’s not just a 2 or 3 month internship, but you’re really there…every weekday…forever basically.  I think for a while I tried avoided this reality because I know my overall goal is to have my own business. I would have thought that I would already be a business owner right now at 21 and that hasn’t happened yet. Not being where I want with my goal as an entrepreneur was very stressful probably earlier this summer but now I’m in a different place. When I look at the age 21 typed right now it actually is quite young lol. I guess I’m saying this to just reflect on an ongoing reality that I’ve put myself at ease with so that I can help myself realize that I can make peace with my current problems as well. I know going on dozens of interviews is nerve-wracking but I’ve been on dozens before and I just want to get this done and secure this bag. I won’t loose sight of having a business and I will continue to build my brand, take action on my ideas, and make progress step by step (and daibydai).

By now I have almost devoured an entire box of grapes. Grapes were so rare in Ghana an d just 10 large grapes were equivalent to $3 USD. So you can guess that I refrained from eating grapes. On today’s agenda I plan to go to the Castelo de S. Jorge, Museu Colecao Berado and Bario Alto. We shall see how the day goes. And at night, I will be doing some sincere journaling, reflecting, and slowly getting into the productive mode of facing my responsibilities.

When I look at my life now, I know that I am exactly where I wanted to be 5 years ago. I’ve actually gone to so many places I dreamed of. I made it into my major. I’ve passed all those classes that I thought I wouldn’t. I made it through back to back interviews and had some interesting internships. I finally have the fro I always wanted. I think I’m doing just fine and I’ve made it so far. Maybe there’s nothing wrong with the reality I’ve been so reluctant to face but right now I’m just thinking to myself and I think I will be okay.


View from the Castello S. Jorge