Greetings Daizies,
Hello to the new year! For my first blog post this year I wanted to check-in with the things I’ve learned in my mindfulness journey and my intentions as I move forward. In last year’s mindfulness check-in I wrote about my struggles with looking at mindfulness as trying to have a streak of only feeling positive and happy. I was starting to learn in real-time that mindfulness is a journey and letting go of perfectionism is so freeing. Since then and an entire pandemic I have learned so much more and continue to do so. Here are some of my most valuable lessons:
All Emotions Really Are Temporary
It’s so fascinating how the intensity of a problem in a given point of time can be transformed into something entirely different just a year later. All feelings, whether they are joyful or intense pain, have an expiration. It won’t last forever. And it’s not like we don’t all know this or haven’t heard this before, but taking the time to pause, breathe, and realize this helps to lessen the gravity of the current discomfort you might feel.
Building the Muscle of Resilience Makes it Easier to Bounce Back From Challenges Quicker
Happiness comes and goes but resilience is a skill that helps you cope with challenges. I’ve noticed that the constant reinforcement of taking things day by day, breathing, understanding the emotions are temporary and intentionally practicing self kindness helps me to move through set backs with more ease. I recall the Saturday afternoon, the day we received the election result news, I had planned to go to the post office and take care of some errands. I had spent more time than I intended watching the news, talking on the phone and connecting with people about the good news of the presidency results that when it was time to drive to the office, there’s was too much traffic from celebratory residents that I was not going to make it in time. My first thought was “dang it! If I had of just woken up earlier and not talked on the phone so long I would have been able to cross this off my to do list.” I could have easily let this thinking become more self destructive and think I was being lazy and unfocused and do more harm than necessary when in reality, I could simply complete this task in 2 days. There was nothing detrimental that was going to happen by shipping what I needed to ship on Monday instead. I remember pulling over and playing a 2 minute breathing exercise and feeling so calm, with slower thoughts, and a gentle laugh. I was able to move on without being mean to myself and just moved on with the rest of my day. I love that for myself.
Having a Daily Habit That Contributes to Mindfulness Actually Works
I always wondered what it took to be able to have composure and not just cry or disengage out of frustration and would read about mindfulness helping out with this skill. I would think “now how does sitting somewhere still for 10 minutes a day help me not feel like it’s the end of the world everyday?” And I think 2020 provided various opportunities to just pause and take things day by day. I’ve also learned that mindfulness comes in many different forms and it doesn’t have to look like painfully sitting still for several minutes at a time.
I feel the effects of habit and how what I consume plays a role in my thoughts. I have been a subscriber of the Calm meditation and sleep app for a year now and I love the Daily Calm meditations where there is a beautiful daily message to listen to that gives advice for your mindfulness practice and dealing with stress. One of my favorite things I’ve learned is the act of giving yourself loving-kindness by placing your hand on your heart and saying to yourself “may you be well, may you be at peace, may you be loved.” It’s such a sweet act that feels like giving myself a giant hug at the start of my day.
Moving Forward
Life is not about the constant striving for happiness. I think happiness comes and goes. Bad times, failures, annoyances, and irritations will happen. That’s just a part of life. In the present day, this is something that is not always easy to accept. It’s often I feel a constant tension to want things to always work out and to always be at a pace all of the time. What mindfulness has helped me to see is that while I prefer the amazing feeling to the sad ones, both will come and it’s okay when it happens. You can embrace your emotions and just try to do things that are soothing to you and make you feel good. There’s no scorecard involved with mindfulness either so you can go at your own pace because it’s YOUR journey.
Always remember,
