What Being in My First Pageant Taught Me

Greetings Daizies, 

I can’t believe it’s literally August already! Since starting my product line there have been so many changes in my life but one thing is for sure, writing will always be in my heart and I’m excited to get back to more frequent posts. I’d be remiss to not have a single blog post relating to my 1.5 year reign as Miss Black Washington International Ambassador and my entire experience competing in my first pageant! So I wanted to take some time to share some of my top learnings from competing as it was definitely a once in a lifetime experience. 

HOW TO TALK ABOUT AND PROMOTE MYSELF 

In the past I have found it sometimes challenging and just overall awkward to talk about myself and things I work on (blogging, YouTube, etc) but in the past year I have had to really step out of my comfort zone and get really confident in talking about myself. For one, you can’t gain new customers for a business by being silent. So when I started making hair products I began talking a lot more about my brand to people that might be interested. Being in a pageant only pushed this further. My heart would beat so fast as I got ready to give my 30-second elevator pitch about the pageant competition and my platform each time. But each time, I would feel even more confident talking about it and I would be so excited to find that people were interested, excited and wanted to know how they could support. 

There was one instance where I was outside trying to take pictures of myself using my tripod when a couple walked past, saw me with my crown and sash on and began asking me questions. It was great practice for answering questions on the spot and they also turned out to be one of my sponsors. I was happy to be in the right place at the right time but also just talking about what I’m involved in and inviting people in to be a part of the journey.

WHEN YOU DON’T SEE A LANE, CREATE YOUR OWN

The central purpose of pageants is usually around having a platform or an effort towards helping the community. I had full range and responsibility over how I would be a change agent in my community and how I would shine light on my platform of health, wellness, and self-care. Essentially it was all up to me to figure out what to do and how. This definitely had me overwhelmed many times as I was trying to figure out new ideas for events and volunteer opportunities, plan the promotion for each effort, and develop a social media strategy throughout the year…all while running DaibyDai, launching new products etc. With my motto in mind of taking things step by step and day by day,  I was like okay, “what are some things I have control over that I could make happen?” 

While in the midst of a pandemic, virtual settings provided a way to bring people together and I could experiment with new ideas I had in mind. An example of this was my Show & Tell series where entrepreneurs, bloggers, and content creators came together to show demos of hair styles, skincare tips, and wellness routines. I hosted two events like this, Natural Hair Show & Tell and the Wellness Show & Tell, all with the purpose of raising funds to support local non-profit organizations for things like natural hair essential kits and new home essentials. I loved seeing an idea I had in my head for a while, and just trying it out! You’ll never know the outcome until you try, so just try it out.

THE ANSWER WILL ALWAYS BE A NO IF YOU DON’T ASK

Along with simply getting comfortable talking about myself, I had to also work the muscle of pitching myself with a call to action for things like sponsorships and even event collaborations. I’m telling you, there were so many weeks that went by where I was procrastinating sending out an email inviting someone to sponsor me or an organization to work with me on an upcoming idea because I was afraid of rejection. I was just so nervous of what people would say and it made me so anxious! But the deadlines still existed so I had to really step out of my comfort zone many times to help get towards my goal. And yes, there were many emails that went unanswered. My last deadline was to solidify 2 ad book sponsors. There was an afternoon where I emailed at least 25 local businesses for support. I didn’t get a single response back. But what I did learn was the art of garnering monetary support. The successful interactions I had were with organizations where I had some sort of connection – Foster School of Business and Pierce College. The other emails probably went in the trash but I think it was more meaningful to hear from an alumna and how their support would help me.

Anyways, it didn’t get any easier but I learned how to just hype myself up to send the email, make that phone call, and just see what happens. 

REMEMBERING WHAT IT’S LIKE TO DO SOMETHING FOR THE FIRST TIME 

I love trying new things and being in a pageant was definitely one of the most different things I’d ever done. I think oftentimes as we get older, we don’t really put ourselves in positions where we are doing something very different than what we’re used to. I had 0 experience and often felt like I was super behind with everything in the pageant. I felt like I had a lot of pressurI wish I had let it sink in earlier that this is the first time I was doing a pageant so it was okay if I didn’t know everything. I mean working full-time, running a business, AND being in a pageant during a pandemic was  A LOT. So overall, giving myself grace and pacing myself were acts of self care I want to remember for the next time I’m doing something for the first time.


FOCUS ON YOURSELF AND DO YOUR BEST

The whole outcome of a pageant is based on the competition but in the end whoever is meant to win will win. I learned so much about practicing mindfulness to catch myself when I am spending too much time comparing myself to others. This was especially crucial with social media and during a pageant year where social media was often one of the categories contestants would get judged.  I learned to ask myself “Am I spending a few minutes to get

some new ideas or learn some helpful tips? Or am I bored or feeling overwhelmed and looking to see how much better or prepared I think someone else is than me?” 

I couldn’t think about what dress, costume, or walking experience everyone had coming into the competition. I had to remember to simply do my best and celebrate how far I had come. This was my first time doing something like this and I really did an amazing job and seeing the whole thing through. There were so many times when I just wanted to quit. So many deadlines that I thought I wouldn’t make. So in the end, when I finally got to The Bahamas I knew that I had made it! I had accomplished my goal of following through with the journey and I wanted to have as much fun as possible. Pageant week was no walk in the park and it was some early early mornings and late nights. But I made some great people and it was a memorable experience for sure. 

Have you ever competed in a pageant? What did you learn? 

As always,